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"today i was at the gym and someone who is sort of mad at me i guess walked in and i didn't expect it. it made me really, really nervous that i got light headed and thought i was going to pass out... my emotions are all over the place and it is exhausting."

"yeah, you're definitely having stress issues. you need to try something to calm it down."

and you give me this long explanation of self-meditation.

i really do feel awful lately. i'm not sleeping well. my immediate reaction to many people or situations is just, "fuck you." today i have a murderous headache that won't go away.

i am hoping that at least some of this is my hormones trying to regulate themselves without birth control. my appointment is thursday so hopefully i will be back on it soon and most of this will go away.

it's not fun.

i know that a lot of parts of me are extreme but goddamn, this feels nuts.