but god do i wish you happiness. i need to sell my rings. i've nearly gotten rid of anything that reminds me of you. i've almost cut you entirely out of my life. sometimes my heart hurts if i think about what a failure i am. then i remember the ways you yelled at me, the names you called me, the plate of food you threw at me. then i don't think i'm so much of a failure anymore.
10.23.11