oh sleep i neeeed you i can't wait to go home this weekend. i need a break. i say that a lot, though. and isn't it pathetic that i wish you'd randomly want to see me when i go? it'd be more for the satisfaction of someone i once wanted, to want me more... i guess. i slept for twelve hours last night, but now i'm only going to get about five. i can never stay on any set schedule. ah, can't i just have someone who will massage my feet and kiss my forehead and sleep beside me?* that boy i went on a date with, matt, i told him i probably wouldn't be able to see him this week because to be perfectly honest i am so busy i can't think straight. it kind of makes me angry the way he replied to it though. it felt kind of... i don't really want to say possessive, but maybe constricting? my problem here is i have no interest in trying to save anyone, i don't want to be your solution, and i don't want to put you in front of everything else i want to accomplish. so... sorry? *in this diary i complain a lot about relationships/lack thereof. this is because i have two diaries, and no one i actually know reads this one... so that is its focus.
10.18.11